Have a Plan! - CornerHouse Prevention Tips Series
Written by: Jane Straub, CornerHouse Training Director
Made possible by: Northmarq
As a parent, one of our most primal fears is that of not being able to find our child. According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children “stranger” abductions are very rare: 1% of all cases of missing children involve a stranger that “takes” a child. That statistic, however, does not help our brain when we are in a store or at a park and momentarily lose sight of our child.
What IS common is that children may get lost or wander, they may walk away from a parent at a park, may walk to the toy or candy aisle at a store, or hide in the circular clothing racks (personal experience)! When and if this does happen, it is helpful for the parent’s brain AND the child’s brain to have a plan!
Step 1: Show the helpers.
The next time you are at a store, point out the people who work there. Show your child the cashiers, the employees who are wearing name tags, and other places in the store where they can find an employee. Tell your child, “If you ever get lost, go to one of the helpers and tell them that you cannot find me, your dad, etc…” (insert person). Let your child know that part of the employees’ job is to help children who may need help. Research shows that children who “freeze” and are not empowered to ask for help may be more vulnerable. Talking about it, making a plan, and practicing will help both brains engage if your child does wander off.
Step 2: Teach your child your name.
Yes, there may be a time that your child yells out “Jane, I am hungry” instead of “Mom, I am hungry” but that is okay! Teach your child to yell out your name if they cannot find you. Our brains are wired to hear and respond to our names. A child yelling “mom” may be white noise, but a child yelling “Jane” will enter our ears and brains like a siren! Knowing your name will also “help the helpers” if they find your child wandering or crying, “Mom” is hard to identify, while “Jane Straub” is a bit easier.
Step 3: Information is Power.
In addition to your child knowing your full name, as they grow older, teach your child their full name, their address, parents or caregiver’s cell phone, where their parent or caregiver works, or the name of their childcare provider (if applicable) is such powerful information. The world is truly full of wonderful people who want to help, but sometimes we do not equip our children will helpful information. The idea is NOT to scare our children, but to make a plan; “if you ever find yourself lost or needing help, this is how to reach me”.
For more information about the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, visit their website at: https://www.missingkids.org/